I’ve left more than one medical appointment frustrated and having a lower opinion of myself because a lab test or some other measurement isn’t up to snuff. After a conversation with a physician friend, I got it that I need to be clear of my assets and that in many ways they are more powerful and important than the “numbers” I’m aware that being mortal that this will not always be the case, but when living with a chronic condition, it’s important to lead with our assets before we become overwhelmed by the deficits.
Medical providers are often so focused on problem solving care, they are more concerned with the problems, needs and deficiencies and ignore the very things that can help us heal and have a powerful influence in our lives. We need to remind ourselves and our care providers that we do have assets and it’s helpful to note them. Accentuating the positive capabilities and nurturing the strengths and resources of people can help them activate solutions for health and well-being that promote their self-esteem and resilience.
Susan Pinker’s TED Talk is an eye opener about what assets keep us living longer and enrich our lives.
Referring to the research of Julianne Holt-Lunstad she lists from the least predictive to the most predictive of what influences longevity. Clean air is at the bottom of list. Moving up weight (doesn’t have the impact we might think). Exercise is a moderate predictor, cardiac event with rehab is next followed by getting a flu vaccine, stopping drinking and smoking and so forth. However, the top two predictors of living longer were close relationships and social integration. Pinker describes social integration as follows, This means how much you interact with people as you move through your day. How many people do you talk to? And these mean both your weak and your strong bonds, so not just the people you're really close to, who mean a lot to you, but, like, do you talk to the guy who every day makes you your coffee? Do you talk to the postman? Do you talk to the woman who walks by your house every day with her dog? Do you play bridge or poker, have a book club? Those interactions are one of the strongest predictors of how long you'll live.
The UK has been studying asset based health care for decades, which they have summarized as “head, hands and heart.” Starting with these three questions, I’ve added some more to help identify what your assets might be.
As you start to answer these questions, don’t limit the assets to just yourself. You are most likely part of a family and community so include networks and resources of both. For example, having a park near your home where you like to walk with a friend(s) is an important asset.
What are my Assets?
- What knowledge do you have? (Head)
- What skills do you have? (Hand)
- What are you passionate about? (Heart)
- Do you consider yourself resilient? (having the ability to bounce back from difficult situations) If you need some help in deciding if you are resilient, try the How Resilient Are You? Test. https://www.nwpgmd.nhs.uk/sites/default/files/resiliencequestionnaire.pdf
- Do you have a sense of purpose?
- Do you like learning?
- Are there physical places in your community that support health and well-being such as parks, sidewalks, gardens, playgrounds, trails, picnic areas, fishing spots etc.?
- Are there organizations that can be source of help, socializing etc.? Consider community based organizations, book club, library, civic event groups, continuing education, senior centers etc.
- Do you spend time with friends and family, talking to them, eating together, bonding, and enjoying one another’s company?
- Do you have at least three stable relationships?
- Are you socially engaged?
- Do you have “buddies” on whom you can rely?
- Do you own a pet?
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