Saturday, December 3, 2011

Balancing Giving and Receiving This Holiday Season

We’ve all been raised with the idea it is better to give then to receive and where this is most exemplified is during the Holidays. “What do you mean you aren’t going to go to your parents (who live 300 miles away) for Christmas? How can you be so selfish?” “It’s the perfect present for Jack (substitute any name). You can always put it on plastic.”

I’ve done a variety of posts on this topic. However, at this time of year, we all need the reminder to try and achieve some sort of balance in this season of excess.

The fact is, when you are dealing with a chronic disease, you don’t always have the energy to travel or party or have the money to pay for expensive presents. At the same time, you may have to heavily depend on others to help you with the basics of daily living, such as getting to doctor’s appointments, grocery shopping, child care etc. If you are a caregiver, you may be so depleted from giving that the idea of “holiday giving” is more than you can stand

We need to keep a balance of giving and receiving. It can’t go all one way. We only need to look outside our window to get the picture. At this time of year, when we have just celebrated the bounty of harvest, the ground now lays quiet. Living in snow country, it is if the land is tucked in for a long much needed sleep. It is it’s time for the earth to recharge so that in the spring it can once again bloom and provide.

Consider the following:

Watch for warning signs that you are out of balance. These can include: feelings of being very anxious and tense (clenched jaws); a flare in symptoms; complaining; feeling listless and not wanting to do anything.

Identify yourself: Are you a constant giver? (No rationalizations about why you give too much). If so, be willing to receive. Are you a constant taker? If so, start giving of yourself. For tips on balancing giving and receiving, read January’s post on this topic.

Read previous holiday posts:
Holiday Songs Can be good Reminders for People With Chronic Conditions

Holidays: Over Do the Laughter and Under Do the Stress

• Do what you can realistically do. The idea of sacrificing yourself for others is not a good idea.

• Use this time to let people know how special they are to you with meaningful gifts that do not deplete your income. Check out the following posts for ideas and suggestions:

Balancing Giving and Receiving: Includes ideas on giving when you are relying on others for help and assistance

Holiday Gifts for People with chronic disease

Unique Gifts for Hospital Patients

The Best and Worst Holiday Gifts for People with Cancer

Keep the joy alive by reminding yourself daily of what you have to be grateful for and brings you joy. They can be as simple as watching snowfall, the smell of baking cookies or a fresh cut pine tree or the smile of appreciation from someone you helped.

Take a Break. Every Wednesday is “take a break day.” If you don’t care for this particular weeks “break,” try the archive section, which includes hundreds of ideas.

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