It’s the Little Things That Make a Big Difference When Someone is Ill

I spent the past week in New York City (NYC) as our son was having a  heart procedure as a result of a hereditary condition. It was extremely anxious situation for him and for us. However, all of it was made so much easier by the little things that people did. While it may not seem like you’ve done very much, the smallest of kindnesses is worth its weight in gold.

Below are all the ways that made a difference

 • Walking up to the NYU Langone hospital complex, we were greeted by a 38 foot tall Dalmatian balancing a NYC yellow cab. It made us smile and improved our mood. It also sends a message that anything is possible. Spot is the creation of Donald Lipski, who has been a patient at the hospital. He provided the following insight into his sculpture, “It is a stressful time, and I wanted to make something that would delight them; something so astounding it would distract even those arriving for the most serious procedures, and so lovable that young patients coming back again and again with chronic conditions would see it as an old friend,” said Lipski, who believes there is a reparative quality to art. “Art has actual healing power. That’s a fact! I like to think that the parents, the doctors and nurses and staff, the neighbors, will all love this sweet young dog doing the impossible.” Couldn’t agree with more that art can improve one's mood and aid in healing. 

• Several people e-mailed the day before and the day of the surgery to let us know they were thinking of us and praying for a speedy recovery. The fact that they remembered and took a minute or two to let us know lifted our spirits.

• My older son took time off from work to be with us. Our sons’ good friend also joined us for the lengthy wait at the hospital. There was lots of laughter, which always helps.

• There were various times during the 24 hours we spent at the hospital where we could be with our son. Watching his brother rub his feet did wonders for all of us.

• A liaison staff member at the hospital kept us informed of what was happening.

• My brother-in-laws and their close friend opened their homes to us, so we had a place to stay together, park our car and provided us meal after meal along with lots of hugs and support. My husband’s brother has the same heart issue, and had gotten our son into care when he began to have problems. We couldn’t have stayed with anyone better who understood exactly what was going on. Can’t imagine we were the best of house guests, but you’d never know it by how we were treated.

• While it was hotter than blazes in NYC, it was quite cold in the hospital. One of the nurses brought me a heated blanket. A moment of bliss.

• My son’s medical team brought lots of humor and support. In addition, they were also able to talk to our older son about what he needs to do if he should have symptoms. While no one wants to hear that they are at risk for anything, the physician’s assistant made him feel he had a place to go and would be well taken care of.

• The ancillary staff at the hospital that greeted us with a smile no matter the time of day or where we were. A genuine smile matters more than you know.

• The other people waiting to hear how their family/friend was doing became an impromptu support group. Talking to someone in a similar situation definitely helps.

• Our friends who watched pets and made sure everything was okay at home.

• The “get well” messages that people e-mailed and facebooked all touched us in such positive ways.